Paradise
by windnature
Summary: Every time she closed her eyes


_**When she was just a girl**_

"Riza" Berthold began to speak approaching his daughter. Her instincts told her to run away, but afraid of what her father's would do, she stood perfectly still. Though she couldn't help but to flinch as he brushed her golden bangs out of her eyes. "There is something I need you to do" his raspy voice sent chills up Riza's spine, "I have completed my life's work, and I need you to carry with you. To be it's guardian"' He lead is daughter to the surgical table, the harden metal brushing aganist her hip

Carry it with me? But how? I don't under-

And suddenly Riza realized what her father wanted. The table, the needs and the ink. All of it was perfectly clear: Riza Hawkeye would carry the secrets of his research, but not the way she imagine. It would become a part of her. Berthold instructed Riza to take her shirt off, and lay across the table, and without a word spoken, Riza did as her father asked, removing her shirt and laying down in silence. The table was cold against her bare chest which caused her to shiver slightly.

"Don't move" Berthold Hawkeye coldly instructed as he held the tattooing needles in his hand. She heard her father's words and laid perfectly still once more. The pain would unbearable, but if she fidgeted slightly, his entire master piece would be ruined. His hands were calloused and rough as he pressed down onto her skin, marking the location of his first indentation. As the needles pressed against her skin, a burning sensation ripped through her entire body. She didn't make a sound. No sympathy would be given to her from this man. For she understood her father didn't see his actions as permanently mutilating his daughter's back, but using her as a canvas for his life's work. She would carry this for him long after his death. She didn't exactly want this burden, but her father wasn't looking for her agreement upon it.

_**She expected the world**_

Mister Mustang was her choice. Her father instructed the blonde to choose wisely to the holder of his alchemy, though she already knew who his choice would be. It was probably the only thing the Hawkeye's would agree to. The solider was more than flustred when she became taking her clothes off. He was going to speak but fell dealthly slient as his dark eyes could see the arry that would on her back. "Miss Hawkeye.." his voice trailed off as he stepped closer.

The pads of his fingers rested gently on her back which caused Riza to shiver slightly. His hands were suprisingly cold. He mubbled something to himself, though she couldn't make it entirely out. Not that many words that needed to be said at the moment. For Riza, she knew this was a clear indicator that Roy Mustang was the man she would trust her back too. It would ensure a future full of happiness and hope for their country.

_**But it flew away from her reach **_

As she stared out of the eye piece of her M40 rifle, as her eyes caught her next victim. The Ishlvan was wearing an amber color robe like her eyes, which grabbed her attention. He was standing amidst the rubble, trying to hide from the soldiers that were on the ground. He didn't think anyone could see him. She position the shot to his right temple, it would result in the greatest amount of trauma, and he would be killed instantly. With the pull of her trigger, the bullet was sent flying to it's target. He immediately hit the ground. He never saw it coming.

"Great shot Cadet Hawkeye"

She didn't answer to her commanding officer's praises.

Sixty seven. That was the number of Ishvlans she had killed that day. Riza Hawkeye had become a stone cold killer, a praised sniper of the military. Some had said they hadn't seen a shot like hers since General Grumman. She never imagine her life would come to this.

The time with the one she loved, almost seem like a dream.

It had been four years since she last saw him, but she knew he was in Ishval as well. Some of the officers spoke of a powerful alchemist was able to clear entire section of Ishvalans rebels with one snap of his fingers. His name was Major Mustang. Words couldn't describe how much guilt she had felt when she learned what the military was making the alchemist do. Making_him_ do.

This was her fault. She knew the destructive power of flame alchemy and she gave it to him anyway. He wanted to save people with it, but instead, he was forced to kill thousands with his flames. She took her burden off her shoulders and gave it to him. How _selfish_ would she be?

As her ember eyes looked into her eye piece once more, she noticed two men standing among the rabble in the Ishvalan sand. Who would stand in the middle of a war field so causally? She took a closer look at his features and saw something familiar: His dark eyes. Before she could react to anything else she noticed an Ishvalan standing behind the duo. Cadet Hawkeye shot the man before he could harm the Major and his companion. The two seemed dazed that the Hawk Eye's had saved their lives.

Thanks to Hawkeye, their section had been cleared and it was time to return to camp. She carried her riffle on her shoulder as the snipers left the abandoned building. She placed the hood of her jacket over head. She didn't want to be noticed by Mustang until the time was right.

It had been a year, and she wasn't used to the environment. The harsh Ishvalan heat was quite overwhelming, and the winds made her ears ring. But, she heard a familiar voice not far from her. She looked up and saw Roy speaking with the man she had saved earlier. She was relived to see he was alive. The duo walked towards her when she decided to remove her hood. His expression of seeing was more than any words could say.

She figured he would be angry with her since she had been the one to cause him the pain she knew he was feeling. She gathered her courage and spoke:

"It's been a long time Major Mustang, _do you remember me_?"

**and the bullets catch in her teeth **

With her final article of clothing removed from her upper body, Hawkeye could feel Mustang's foot steps coming closer to her. "Can you stand against the wall?" he asked her. She noticed a changed in his voice, but decided to do what he asked instead of questioning him about it. He didn't want to do this to Hawkeye, but she needed this to be done. The blonde pressed her forehead firmly against the aging wall with her fist balled up tight. "You should use a pillow. Just in case something should happen.." He was referring to the possibility of her screaming from the pain. No matter how much it this would hurt her, Hawkeye didn't have any plans on screaming. This would release her suffering and it would be in silence. She could hear him slipping the cloth of his ignition gloves over his hands. Soon, this would all be over and the Cadet needed to brace herself for it.

She could sense his hesitance. Hawkeye understood she was asking too much of him. She wanted him to burn the source of his alchemy, to the deface the back of his master's daughter. How could she expect that of him? As selfish as her want was, she needed this burden to release from her. Hawkeye didn't want her father to have a hold on her life anymore. "Mustang, please." she pressed him as she clenched her hands tighter. With a deep inhale, Hawkeye, heard the spark of his glove an enemse burning sensation on her left shoulder. Another snap was released and it finally registerd to the blonde's body that she was being burned. The flames danced around her back as she bit on her lower lip, sweat pouring down her face as her body shook violently. She couldn't describe the horrific pain that she was experiencing, but with that she could feel the tints of of relief flooding into her body. It was over. The pain that she inflicted on others, including Major Mustang was now gone never to be seen or used by anyone else again.

When the flames finally ceased, she felt Mustang's cloth covered hands carefully guided the blonde to her bed. He helped her laid down on her stomach, turning her face so he could see her. He sat next to her as he took his gloves off and reached for the medical kit he asked from Knox. She could feel him rubbing something onto her back and it burned immensely, but she assumed it was something for her burns. The possibilities of an infection from a burn so serve was quite great. Luckily Mustang thought ahead and brought everything the blonde would need. When he was finished applying the various creams and oppiments he brought, the alchemist began bandaging her up. He wrapped around her shoulder a few times, just to be sure it would stay in place. "Is there anything that you need?" he asked her, his voice much raspier than it actually was. She watch him lean over to see her just face. The pain in his eyes were almost too much for Riza to bear and despite the overflow of emotion she was feeling, she simply smiled as best as she could. "No. " she managed to get out despite the dryness of her throat. "But thank you Mustang.." he voice trailed off as she finally past out from the sheer pain and exhaustion.

_**Life goes on, it gets so heavy**_

_The air was arid and dry as the Cadet peered down from her post. There wasn't anything out of the ordinary on this day. The screams and the smell of blood hadn't phase the Hawk's Eyes for months. Her deadly ember hues peered into her eye piece once more when she noticed something. It was the Flame Alchemist. She didn't recall his orders to assist the snipers with clearing out this section on this day. Though their encounters were usually brief, she knew something was wrong. His targets weren't precise as they always had been. His movements were erratic and she noticed that he wasn't just targeting Ishvalans. He was killing soliders with his dangerous flames. _

_"STAND COVER! THE FLAME ALCHEMIST IS COMING!"_

_Dammit. _

_Riza geeted her teeth as she pointed her rifle at him. The beads of sweat began to roll down her back as she realease the safety of her firearm. Major Mustang was a threat to herself and the rest of the squad of snipers, but could she actually go through with it? Could she kill the only person she had left? But what choice did she have? He was going to kill them all if she didn't stop him. Though he was the last person she wanted to point her gun at, Hawkeye knew what she had to do. She shallowed hard as she positioned the shot in the middle of his forehead. Though he was moving, she knew the slight stops he make in order to excute his alchemy. With the realease the trigger, the infamous Flame Alchemist went down and hit the bloody sands without even knowing who shot him._

_Her comrades were more than happy that the rague Alchemist had been taken down, but she wasn't. All the cadet could do was watch helplessly as his blood began to soak the heated grain around him. She couldn't bring herself to look anymore. The Hawk's Eyes had taken the Flame Alchemist down with a single shot and she was more disgusted with herself. Suddenly she was engulfed with flames as the snipers around her began to disappear. Her eyes widen with shock as she saw the Major standing before her with the bullet hole still seeping with his blood. There was a eerie voice surrounding the two. _

_You've done this. You've destoryed everything. EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH DIES RIZA HAWKEYE! YOU COULDN'T SAVE THE ONE WHO YOU CHERISH MOST!_

_Roy began to scream as his body was engulf with flames. _

_"__**MUSTANG!**__"_

She gasped destrately as she sat up in bed. It was another nightmare. They were quite frequent, but this one seemed so real. She wipped the sweat off her forehead as she buried her face into her hands. Despite how thankful she was her nightmare hadn't been reality, one fact did remain clear….

If the Colonel was to deter from his path, she would have to shoot him, but not in his forehead. She knew exactly where the last bullet she would ever shoot would lay. It would be forever embedded in the middle of his skull. It's the location that doesn't cause much pain and death is quick. After hurting him for so many years, Riza wanted his death to be quick and painless.

_**The wheel breaks the butterfly **_ _**Every tear a waterfall **_


End file.
